September 26, 2023

My Struggle with Anxiety

I have suffered from anxiety for as long as I can remember. At first, it was something I just accepted, thinking that everyone around me experienced the same feelings. I soon realised, however, that I was wrong. I was the one who felt suffocated by fear and crippling doubt. I was the one who felt like no matter what I did, I simply couldn’t shake the feelings of dread and worry that seemed to follow me everywhere.

When I was younger, my anxiety was triggered by everyday activities, such as taking a test in school, giving a presentation, or meeting new people. My heart would flutter and my palms would sweat. I felt like my throat had closed up and my brain had short-circuited. I was too scared to speak up or show my work in class, even when I was more than prepared. Instead, I kept my head down and hoped no one would call on me.

As I grew older, the intensity of my anxiety increased. I began to experience more physical and mental symptoms. My chest felt tight and I would find myself taking deep breaths to try and relax. My stomach felt like it was in knots and I would often find myself shaking, unable to control my body’s reaction to the emotional turmoil that I was in.

The worst symptom for me was the racing thoughts. I felt like my head was filled with a swarm of bees, buzzing and buzzing, never stopping. I was constantly worrying about something, even when there was nothing to worry about. I was anxious about my future, my relationships with others, my accomplishments, and even the most mundane tasks that I had to do each day.

At times, my anxiety felt so overwhelming that I had to take time out of my day to sit and breathe. I would close my eyes and focus on my breathing, trying to slow down my racing heart and to calm my mind. I would take deep breaths in and out, noticing how the air felt as it moved in and out of my lungs. I would do this until I felt like I was able to face the rest of the day.

I also found that talking to someone about how I was feeling was helpful. I opened up to a few close friends and family members about my anxiety, and it was a relief to express my feelings to someone who could understand. I began to develop a better understanding of my mental health and the importance of self-care. I started to take time out of my day to do things that made me feel calm, like reading or taking a walk.

While I still struggle with anxiety, I have come to terms with it. I know that it is a part of me and that it is not going away anytime soon. I have learned to accept it and to find ways to manage it. I now understand that reacting to fear or worry with deep breaths and self-care can be helpful. I take time to pause and to focus on my breathing. I talk to friends and family members about how I’m feeling, and I make sure to take care of myself.

My anxiety will always be a part of me, and I’m learning to live with it. I have come to realise that it can be a superpower; it has taught me to be resilient and to keep going even when things get tough. It has also taught me to appreciate the little moments and to find joy in the everyday. I know that, with patience and self-care, I can manage my anxiety and continue to live my best life.

I can teach you how to work with your anxiety and it I know it is difficult to get men into therapy, it is important to know there is a way through this. To explain what it is and give you techniques to manage your stresses. It isn’t an overnight fix, but working with me will bring you understanding, respect and relief of your pain.

Does any of this resonate with you? 

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